5 minutes

Just like any other college day, today when I got off the bus in the evening, I went to ‘Aishwarya Departmental Store’ to buy some bread. While coming out, I saw a few dogs circling around a food stall. So, I went into the store and got a pack of PARLE G to feed them. They seemed happy, and I got my internal satisfaction, but then while returning back, I spotted another beautiful dog who was trying to come closer to nibble on the biscuits, but unfortunately could not as one half of his rear leg was cut leaving him "paw-less". Sounds dramatic? Well, it was!! As, he could not come near me, I bought another pack with 25% extra biscuits and went near him to feed him. I was sure he would eat the whole pack, which he ultimately did.

In the meanwhile, I gave a call to CUPA to which they responded very promptly. So, finally the ambulance came around 9PM, I went down to the departmental store, expecting the dog to be sitting at the same place, but somehow he had moved 100/200 meters away. Once again I opened the pack of Parle G for him. He was almost through half the pack when the ambulance guy signaled me to continue feeding him. Then, suddenly an iron rod was wrapped across the dog's abdomen, which obviously put him in deep anxiety, as a result of which he passed his stool and started screaming, growling, howling and crying for help. But, obviously he was taken to the hospital for treatment, and probably there was no other way to put him in the ambulance. The guy made it look really simple, probably just because it was something he did daily.

But, to me it was one of the most dreadful sights I have ever experienced; those helpless howls were loud enough to question my act. While the guys from CUPA wrapped the iron rod around his abdomen, the innocent dog was eating his food. For the dog, me feeding him might just have been a trick that helped the CUPA guys to get him down. If I consider any human's point of view, my act was fully justified, but what about the dog? To him, I am even worse than the person who took him to the ambulance. These 5 minutes were terrifying for the dog and even for me who made this incident possible.

I experienced, that's why i believe.

“He has a right to criticize, who has a heart to help.” Abraham Lincoln

Thankfully I have friends who justify this quote very well. While I have written three blogs here, they all relate to me in some or the other way. Yes, I am talking about the poem like thing – 750 too, which many, indeed mostly thought it’s an abstract write up, while it is NOT.

Some said that they could hallucinate me speak while they read my last blog (Say yes to sex!) And that’s why my ideas were a perfect source for their confusion. Thus some recommended me to write something which is close to me. There is hardly anything/anybody with whom I relate myself closely.

In that context today I will talk about me and my history with dogs and a Parrot. Let me explain my house set up when I was a kid, may be till I was 10/14 years old. My granddad, my father and mother along with me and…along with us, 8 dogs and a Parrot used to stay. So it means 4 humans and 8 dogs and 1 bird in a 2 bed room flat. Living with 8 furry white Spitz since childhood never allowed me to get bored. In my earlier childhood days, both my parents and grand dad used to go their clinic both in the morning and evening. So, those 8 dogs and a maid used to accompany me. Well, my maid’s work was only to provide me with evening snacks and dinner.

Well, after almost 10 years, I don’t remember every moment clearly, though I wish I could, but few instances like 1 of them pissed on my feet while another bit me on my leg, as I was playing with her tail and yeaa….our parrots’ wings got really big and were coming out of the cage, so I often used to pull it, just to check if it hurts or not, but one day she really got hurt and did not eat for 4/5 days. Oops! Got a good thrashing from my grand dad, I remember.

Anyhow, but when my granddad died in 2000, they all got depressed and stopped having proper diet, even though we tried a lot, ultimately one got infected with some bad disease, all got effected with it. When we consulted with vet, he just advised us to put them to sleep. Well, my mom and dad not being very close to dogs, decided to do so. I was not old enough to put across my words or views, but at that point of time, they might have convinced me to think that their decision was right. So, our house was just like any others. No barking, no dog’s stink and no occasional dog’s pee. We still had that Parrot, even she was getting old. Even her death was on the line, I knew!
Well, soon I joined swimming classes; it has been 15/20 days that I have been learning. But soon I met with an unknown accident, something happened and I got drowned. It’s not small scale drowning case I am talking about. This case made me a super star for 2/3 days in newspaper and media. Been in a ventilator for artificial breathing for 48 hours defines the case, and doctor’s statements like; “He may die or even if he survives, he won’t remember anything of the past”. …Well, these are the stories which my parents told me after I got well.

But, after around 48 hours of unconsciousness, my uncle and my dad were in the hospital with me and my mom was at home. Around 3 o’ clock in the morning I vomited vigorously and the bloody pipes which were inserted came out due to the violent tremors, and I regained consciousness. I know, it sounds too dramatic, but that’s how it was told to me. My dad called my mom up to inform. But again after 5 minutes my mom called up my dad and told that the parrot died after she kept the phone down. The Parrot was healthy, was old but no signs of illness she shown an hour back too.
Well, I don’t know if anybody believes in miracle or not, after this incidence I do. When I tell this story to my friends, they laugh and say that I am living a Parrot’s life. Well, I may be living one.

This will be followed by another story of me and my dog – Gultu.


P.S – Some may consider this as not a blog entry, well may be it is not too. I loved it while I was writing and helped me to smile while I remembered my old childhood days which were spent with my 8 dogs and a Parrot.

Love animals.
Regards

Say YES to sex!

Writing this just to sprinkle some water over my dry blog... Give a casual reading!


Love is one of the most common emotion about which we talk about, yet probably the most indescribable and vague. Love is not one of the primary emotions like happiness or sadness or anger, yet we feel it in every relationship we are in. We talk about love between brothers and sisters, father and mother, granddaughter and grandfather and among friends too. Even though love is an important ingredient in each and every relation, explaining it is not easy.
Anyways I am not going to talk about brotherly love or the love expressed by parents to their children. My focus here will be the love which exists between the couple who are dating each other, yet not married and the concept of “Love at first sight”! Ok, yesterday I was having a pretty long discussion with a friend of mine where she was adamant that sex is not all ways necessary in love relationship while I had the opposite views.
As personally, I could not categorize love as an emotion or a feeling. Anyhow, even differentiating feeling and emotion is equally tough and subjective. But one thing I am sure of that it is accumulation of feelings/emotions and not a result of “direct lead in-lead out system”. Though by mentioning of - Accumulation of feelings, I don’t mean a junkyard of all the sweet memories.
Now the self created model of love which makes sense to me is LOVE = 1) JOY + 2) TRUST + 3) SEX. For a love relationship to be successful these three basic components needs to be there. Well, here I am talking about LOVE and not crush or some random wild sex. Well other surface needs like security, respect and warmth are crucial too. The priorities may be different, but as I said it’s my personal model so I classify them as “Side needs”.

Now, Love without any of these:-
- Joy + Trust:-
Obviously yes, there will be love, but very much similar to love between friends and siblings.


- Trust + Sex:-
Two people develop a trust and feel that they can have a casual sex. Love & happiness exists only till the time one gets an orgasm.

- Joy + Sex:-
Simple! Sex for fun. But, what is missing is LOVE!

Anyways, I doesn’t mean that they happen in an hour time. It is a process and it has to be followed strictly in this same serial order.

Firstly, two people should spend some FUN time with each other and get to know each other well. It should not be like, first meeting followed by a Bang-Bang!
Secondly, TRUST being an important factor needs to be well developed between two partners. While one may replace this term as “respect” too.
Thirdly, SEX; Physical intimacy plays a very important role in a relationship. Anyways, sex may not always refer to intercourse or Ok….never mind!
And regarding the hyped concept of “Love at first sight”. It never happens according to me. One needs to pass on the first two stages at least to experience even a bit of love.


Damnit! Wrote about something related to love. Funny! But yea, it’s easy. Does not include much of brain work.

750!

750


Following the death of honor men,
Walking towards where it begins.
Two faced bullets I fire,
Escaping reality killing my dreams.
Hugging night over light.
Something’s wrong, asking me to decide.
Clustered anger and denial


High tides, winds glow
Distorted mirror show
Every drop making a hole!

Grand supper to make me strong,
It’s not waste but it’s wrong.
Changing season on my call,
It’s a cycle. No right & no wrong.
Not so easy holding on,
I need it. I am not a headstrong.
Further walks, gripping it tight,
Everything counts low, still can’t stop the harm.


High tides, winds glow
Distorted mirror show
Every pill makes a hole!

Shades of fire,
Shades of grey,
I know you enjoy the fucking show!
Sooner or later you will take me away!




Akash
15/08/2010

Point the Dot

A DOT! Exactly! That’s how everything begins! But the same particular DOT has many names attached to it, depending on where exactly it is used. Literally inclined geniuses named it as FULL STOP. To define something beyond whole, mathematicians termed it as DECIMAL & smart people who have created smarter computer have established a wide-ranging cyber world only just with this DOT.

To be precise, DOT reflects the beginning and even forecasts the end. If an entertaining mind of an astrologer can forecast future, why can’t I? Just in case of sexual reproduction it is the 1 tiny sperm cell which fertilizes the ova & forms a zygote. Then after the gestation period, a new life is brought into being. And when one dies, the “LIFE” disappears, in a roundabout way it is the DOT; which was the creator fades away. This is another unexplained personality of DOT.

We see so many DOTs nearby us, but we just ignore thinking it’s a matter of nothingness. Think again! From distance a DOT or a point has no existence, if you believe that, then in that case a star from the earth’s surface looks nothing but a vibrant spot. But in reality some stars like VY Canis Majoris are larger than earth too. These stars hold secrets which our astronomers are still trying to search. And the search will go on. But, I am sure they will crack the mysteries after all it is just a DOT to ours eyes.

To talk about the nature of DOT and If I have to think from a mathematician’s approach, then I may say that it helps in defining a theory in a much more in a clear-cut manner. But, on the other hand it even brings complexities in the approach. You have to agree with me here, when I say 2+2 is easier to calculate than to calculate .2+.2. Our brain perceives those information easily which are presented wholly. Then why to complicate?

Nowadays we tend to quantify each and everything & trust on numbers to determine what’s normal and what’s abnormal. And we should also, but we should keep our vision open towards accepting something beyond numbers. Just a common example – Fever! We say body temperature between 96.8-99.5°F is normal! So, does that mean even a point 1+/- will be abnormal? Again, how would you define “abnormal”? May be what’s abnormal is the “normal”! May be what you think is normal is “abnormal”. Confused? Don’t be, I am just talking about a tiny DOT! You don’t want a tiny DOT to confuse you. Do you?

To me a DOT is a question which has no answer (at least not established in my head) and it is like a parasite which needs a host to survive! For example – my keyboard is a host and it contains signs related to DOT like the sign of comma (,), exclamation mark (!), ellipsis (…) & many others. Without these I could not even write my residential address as it should be. So, does that mean a DOT determines where I stay? You decide! But, it is true that without it also we cannot imagine life!

Following are the two approaches which I could see in my mind's eye regarding DOT. The 1^st one being:-

D - Death

O – Of

T – Time

It helps in bringing a writer’s thought to the end, while it may or may not construct a new one. For a mathematician or the young kids who is learning to calculate, a DOT simply complicates the whole process. And to some extent, I have even seen people’s signature having a DOT at the end. Well, I would not like to comment on this particular case at least. Be smart!

While the 2^nd being

D – Day

O – Of

T – Triumph

Ok, finally something bright! As I mentioned before about the beginning of life process, it’s just by two DOT like living cell uniting in order to put together a new life! Well, for me it’s a day of triumph but some may disagree. Well, to be honest I cannot think much about the eminence of DOT. I may have set up a negative mind set.

Now I would like to recapitulate my random thoughts of my nomadic mind just by telling you the true reason for me to write about a DOT. Just wanted to put across my views regarding a theme simply by writing – Even the weakest & the insignificant (which other considers) ones deserves respect and to be treated equally. I added the concept of DOT, but the reason I myself don’t know. We should not overlook even a tiny idea or a thought or a belief or a mistake & my personal favorite – DOT! All these, what we believe are unimportant are the unidentified cipher of nature, which shouldn’t be ignored. Just in the same manner, every human being is here for a purpose. Ignoring them is like making a fool of your own self.

In my case, DOT was just a idea & thought of writing it over was just a vague conviction. Acted over this DOT, and this helped me to write 1000(approx) words. It may be productive or maybe not, at least I acted upon my idea! That’s important. I am not a preacher nor am I worthy of being one. Everybody gets unnoticed (being an important word) hints from the surrounding. We need to grab them. They were meant for us only!

In between while writing, I thought of writing a paragraph without any FULL STOP, so that I could confuse you & pass on my views in a simpler way. But then I realized why I should spoil the small DOT like hints which I am getting from nature, in order to make you realize something about which I am not sure if you would. So, are you getting any DOT in your mind?

RESPECT THE DOTs; THEY ARE WORTH GIVING A SHOT!

Akash Ghosal

5/7/2010